"Personal affection is a luxury you can have only after all your enemies are eliminated. Until then, everyone you love is a hostage, sapping your courage and corrupting your judgment" - said Orson Scott. I agree. Seems to be the premise of my life - I can speak for no other.
I am what I am, I have what I have and I have come too far. Nothing can be changed and nor do I have the power to change anything. I realize that the flaw lies within. I shall try to amend. This is the best I can have and life has proved that time and again to me. Whenever I have been arrogant enough to just try and save myself from the insanity of others, life has shown that it is inescapable. I do not have a choice as I cannot allow myself to have a choice.
Life is strange that way. You can try and veer from the path that life has set for you and for a while you find yourself meandering down valleys and plains and paths that make you believe that you have successfully set your own course and then Wham!! Life has smacked you right in the face and you open your eyes and see that you are back below the same old tree from where you had started running. You can cut down the tree but the question is - do you want to?
Ha ha... that's Life quietly chuckling at the foibles of us mortals - that we silly sentient beings even have the audacity to think that we can outrun him.
So as I stand below that tree and believe Life's mean and caustic laughter is real... I wonder if I will take a chance again? Try to run again? Maybe I will but that day is not today. Today I am tired and weary and beaten. I cannot fight anymore. And now that I think about it... its not that bad right? Nothing is ever that bad.. Its just about the way one chooses to look at it.
I wonder what happened to my Personal Legend....
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