Sad fairy tales

This is a post by an atom that got drunk and wrote about love!! :D

I spew and I spew into the ether. In the hope that it stays there. I cant take this anymore. All that gives me hope is that I can spew onto this anon ether. Out of this molecule.

So I have a life which makes me consume substances which SHOULD be made illegal so that I cant be unchained. Unchained is good for order. Its the only way to keep order in the universe. Its the only way to not unleash my power. To avoid an explosion. People LIKE order. Its the chains that keep us bound to Earth. To this reality. SO many people have written about the lack of reality and the joy that find in being an anonymous atom. Then how come people who are clean can't write about a world that entices you to explore?? Why is good, boring? Why is typing so tedious? Why do I write so that nobody can read what I write?

Yet I spew. Cos U are my one true friend. Who will not judge me. My reader who does not know who I am. I do not write about filth or issues that may skewer the thoughts of my readers for even a minute. Yet, I hope that I make you think. Ponder. Suffer!

Before you think about my thoughts tho' tell me why the universe of the internet requires me to type? So that I can share? Balls to sharing!

I dont have a problem with that. And the irony. So I have to be able to type coherently to share my thoughts. Just to think aint enough.

Aha. Ahah. Did I ever believe in love stories? Do I believe in love stories?

That is as good as askin me if I believe in paper planes.

I used to believe in Mythology and romances when I was a kid but when I grew up and I realized when I grew up, that some stories were just the imagination of some mythological characters like Vyasa.

So tell me, is love a myth?

I grew up believing (after reading all my books which told me in SO many ways that life begins and ends in love) that love made a difference to one's will to live or die. And yet, love does not give me the hope to live.

And I have love.

So am I a bigger loser than I think? Than the losers? Than other atomic particles who don't even think? Because they can't think?

I logged onto this so that I could create a new anon ID where I cud say what I wanted. Then I asked myself, " Atom, how many times do u think your post maybe read?" and I told myself, "Never"!! Know why I am confident?? Cos another atom who (claims to love me) does not even hear what I say - cos there is no 'access' to me and even when he GOT ACCESS, he does not even remember that I write. I am an atom who knows how to write. He knows that I write and he loves me - but his memory is flawed and so that handicap includes forgetting that I even have a blog.

I am sure tht he does not even know the name of my blog.

Ha ha.

I do love him though.

Just not enough to ruin my life.

Even a saint can do wrong and people will always take the long way round when it comes to remembering that he was a good person before falling off the bledy saint wagon. I am not afraid of my pride and I believe what I can. Live in the sunshine where your a shade can be lost or found.

I wish the past were behind us and all that we have was TODAY. But today is a long time away. I will while my time away with a Bloody Mary!! Why can't the damn drink be called Cherry Pop or Christmas Red?? At least sounds more cheery and less Bledy :D

Its called Bloody Mary and is my fav. Go figure.

Anyhoo... these aint sent to nobody.

Not even to my life :D The only person who believes that I can write (which I can't as u have figured so far) and he does not even remember that I HAVE A blog!! This is the person I love and have but I guess not ever really be happy with because I have to figure out how to be happy to start with!! :)

I am just a sad little atom who likes to whine and then go back to being part of a molecule.

Toodles!